لاریب مرزا
محفلین
اس تحریر سے محمد عدنان اکبری نقیبی کی شریک کردہ ستاروں کے احوال والی تحریر یاد آ گئی۔
تحریر پڑھنے کے بعد اسی کا خیال آیا تھااس انگریزی والے ورژن کو بھی پڑہیے۔ بر سبیل تذکرہ ۔
Height of automation
_______
Hello! Is this Gordon's Pizza?
No sir, it's Google's Pizza.
Did I dial the wrong number?
No sir, Google bought the pizza store.
Oh, alright - then I’d like to place an order please.
Okay sir, do you want the usual?
The usual? You know what my usual is?
According to the caller ID, the last 15 times you’ve ordered a 12-slice with double-cheese, sausage, and thick crust.
Okay - that’s what I want this time too.
May I suggest that this time you order an 8-slice with ricotta, arugula, and tomato instead?
No, I hate vegetables.
But your cholesterol is not good.
How do you know?
Through the subscribers guide. We have the results of your blood tests for the last 7 years.
Maybe so, but I don’t want the pizza you suggest – I already take medicine for high cholesterol.
But you haven’t taken the medicine regularly. 4 months ago you purchased from Drugsale Network a box of only 30 tablets.
I bought more from another drugstore.
It's not showing on your credit card sir.
I paid in cash.
But according to your bank statement you did not withdraw that much cash.
I have another source of cash.
This is not showing on your last tax form, unless you got it from an undeclared income source.
To HELL With Ur Pizza..!!
ENOUGH!!
I'm sick of Google, Facebook, Twitter, and WhatsApp. I'm going to an island without internet, where there’s no cellphone line, and no one to spy on me ...
I understand sir, but you’ll need to renew your PASSPORT ... it expired 5 weeks ago.
اس انگریزی والے ورژن کو بھی پڑہیے۔ بر سبیل تذکرہ ۔
Height of automation
_______
Hello! Is this Gordon's Pizza?
No sir, it's Google's Pizza.
Did I dial the wrong number?
No sir, Google bought the pizza store.
Oh, alright - then I’d like to place an order please.
Okay sir, do you want the usual?
The usual? You know what my usual is?
According to the caller ID, the last 15 times you’ve ordered a 12-slice with double-cheese, sausage, and thick crust.
Okay - that’s what I want this time too.
May I suggest that this time you order an 8-slice with ricotta, arugula, and tomato instead?
No, I hate vegetables.
But your cholesterol is not good.
How do you know?
Through the subscribers guide. We have the results of your blood tests for the last 7 years.
Maybe so, but I don’t want the pizza you suggest – I already take medicine for high cholesterol.
But you haven’t taken the medicine regularly. 4 months ago you purchased from Drugsale Network a box of only 30 tablets.
I bought more from another drugstore.
It's not showing on your credit card sir.
I paid in cash.
But according to your bank statement you did not withdraw that much cash.
I have another source of cash.
This is not showing on your last tax form, unless you got it from an undeclared income source.
To HELL With Ur Pizza..!!
ENOUGH!!
I'm sick of Google, Facebook, Twitter, and WhatsApp. I'm going to an island without internet, where there’s no cellphone line, and no one to spy on me ...
I understand sir, but you’ll need to renew your PASSPORT ... it expired 5 weeks ago.
میں نے بھی پہلے وہیں دیکھا تھا اور اس کےلیے واٹس ایپ ویب استعمال کیا کاپی پیسٹ کرنے کے لیے۔یہ میں نے بھی پڑھا تھا وٹزایپ پہ۔
آپ کو گوگل کا بھیجنا نہ بھایا اور مجھے یہ اعتراض ہے کہ فلاں شہر اور فلاں ملک کیوں مس کر دیاگوگل نے کچھ عرصہ سے ہر ماہ ایک میل کے ذریعے گذشتہ ماہ کی مختصر تفصیل بھیجنی شروع کی ہے۔ یوں لگتا ہے کہ کچھ عرصہ میں روزنامچہ بھی بھیجنا شروع کر دیا جائےگا۔
کیسے مس ہو گیا؟آپ کو گوگل کا بھیجنا نہ بھایا اور مجھے یہ اعتراض ہے کہ فلاں شہر اور فلاں ملک کیوں مس کر دیا